Living Thanks

I have a vivid memory of being eight years old and celebrating Christmas at my grandparents’ house in Springfield, Ohio. We were there with our extended family, opening presents, and I had just received a pair of Barbie Roller skates. “Oooh, thank you!” I said, and meant it. They were hot pink and white and exactly what I’d wanted.

It was then my cousin’s turn—my cousin, who is two years younger than me and into the same things I was, meaning we often received similar gifts but with slightly different details, like I’d get the red-headed version of the blond doll she was given. When she received the same-size box that my skates came in, her eyes lit up. But after tearing off the paper, she stared at the gift and froze while her little face contorted in a scowl before letting out a wail. “HULK ROLLER SKATES???” she cried, holding up and shaking the box containing clunky plastic green skates bearing a menacing headshot of the Incredible Hulk.   

She was livid.

To be fair, she had not asked for them, and we all thought it an odd gamble for my grandparents to take. Later, they explained that they thought having two identical pairs of Barbie skates around their house would get confusing. In the moment, however, that logic was completely lost on my disappointed cousin, and my poor aunt was trying her hardest to diffuse the situation. “Oh wow, look at those neat skates!” she kept saying. “Can you say thank you to grandma and grandpa?”

“Thank you,” my cousin finally grumbled, shoving her Hulk skates to the side.

It is a memory we’ve all laughed about for decades, and it just goes to show that a verbal thank you doesn’t always equal a grateful heart. I’ve been there and done that, saying thankful words that don’t necessarily align with my mindset or actions. Embodying gratitude involves more effort and intention than merely speaking of it. Just like consistent love in action communicates far more than flowery declarations of adoration.

So, what are some ways to grow spiritually through LIVING gratitude? This being the week of Thanksgiving, I’ve been reflecting on that and trying to be more aware of how my habits and perspectives either support or contradict my core values, gratitude most certainly being one of them. Here are a few non-verbal expressions of gratitude I’d like to incorporate more fully into my daily rhythms and decisions:

Gratitude as stewardship:

For my birthday, my son bought me a beautiful plant. I cherish it, not only for the beauty of the plant itself but for his thoughtfulness in picking it out for me. Every day, I check the soil to make sure it’s not too dry or too wet. I dust its leaves and keep it pointed toward the sun. My stewardship of his gift reflects my deep appreciation for his love. Similarly, every time I nourish my body, clean my home, invest in my relationships, etc. I express my gratitude through my actions, ever mindful of the many blessings God has granted me.

Gratitude as contentment:

Greed is insatiable. Admittedly, I am no stranger to trying to comfort myself with possessions. The dopamine rush from buying something new, delivered overnight, is incredibly addictive, yet how quickly that high diminishes and our homes (and lives) become cluttered and complicated.  Becoming content with little, embracing quiet and simplicity as a way of life, quells the turbulence of my passions, replacing lust with tranquility and a deeper appreciation for what I already have.  

Gratitude as trust:

When my own will becomes fragmented from God’s will, fear and expectations snuff out gratitude and hope, leaving me anxious and cold. Increasing my trust in God’s unfolding plan for my life and the lives of those I care about fosters wholeness, patient endurance, and, yes, thanksgiving for His loving providence and presence. Growing in faith and trust is a purposeful pursuit-  a reorienting of my attention from my own short-sighted desires and limited understanding to an eternal and resurrectional perspective on my circumstances.  

Giving thanks by listing my blessings before bed in a gratitude journal is good. Very good. Living thanks through my words, responses, choices, and mindset is a stabilizing and countercultural act of discipline and restraint.

Today, God, help me replace grumbling with praise, frustration with acceptance, despair with hope, slothfulness with fruitfulness, and distraction with inner vigilance. Teach me to rejoice in Your will for me.